I am not against China - I am for Tibet

I am not against china, I am for Tibet

Mr Dalai Lama

How true this rings for just about everything in my life at the moment.  I have a feeling that whilst this year is going to be full of great things, good times and adventure, my real manta will be “I am not against China, I am for Tibet”

Primarily at the moment, I can apply this mantra to my current teaching situation.  Having for quite some time struggled with working for Tasswing, time and patience prevailed when Kara and Helen announced they are launching a new (swing) dance school in hobart.  Much to my joy I have been invited to teach for FootNotes, but it has surprised no one more than myself to realise, I’m not against Tasswing, I am for footnotes.

It is no secret that I have been known for my spite and malice over the years, and I thought this would be the one time I could revel in announcement of moving to greener pastures, but in a moment of clarity it dawned on me that we are all to a certain degree responsible for our successes and failures and we are all most certainly responsible for how we handle ourselves in the mist of both jubilation and despair.  To this end, I ever so desperately want the success of FootNotes, and my career there to be successful on its own merit, and not due to the potential demise of TasSwing just as desire for their success to be their own, and not at the demise of mine.

I am no longer privy to the goings on over at TasSwing, but I can say that Tibet seem to be making sure that their government and structures are strong and their people are happy - that's priority number one.  Things like foot binding in regional China aren't something they or I need to worry about, which to be honest, I a real relief.

Anyway, really I guess I just want to convey that I am so excited and looking forward to this year, looking forward to challenges, rewards and successes, be that though dancing, at work or at home, and my biggest wish is that my successes are not at the detriment of others, that my rewards are heart felt when given and received and that my challenges while daunting, will be focus of my attention until they are conquered and then onward and upward again.

ps - for more details on the launch of FootNotes - stay tuned for the next blog, check out http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=173973335975135&ref=ts

or contact info@footnotesdance.com.au

The Scarf

Its not often I'm cool with announcing publicly that I somehow managed to grind the skin of my boyfriends face, WITH MY INNER THIGHS, but today, I feel its ok.

A few weeks ago, I was lucky enough to attend a Shob and Andy weekend of workshops, although they were all fun, the aerials workshop was by far the most grueling and rewarding (what am I talking about?  I still have all my face skin!!).

Its hard to explain and I have had no luck finding a youtube clip, but essentially what happens is the follow starts on right hand side of her partner and ends up wrapping her right inner thigh onto her leads face, while she hooks her knee pit around his neck. Then with a vigorous swoosh she throws her arms around in a big circle, while her head hurtles toward the floor, in a moment of delight and confusion, her head comes back up, but now somehow she is behind her partner, and ends up with her feet on the floor, bent over his left shoulder in a "somersault" position. 

Now if all goes according to plan, no one gets hurt (massive kudos to our spotters!!), but occasionally things like me gripping onto Kyles neck as I'm trying to spin around him, makes it hard for him to really get into anything that resembles a somersault position, due to the fact that I have forced his head to be at my knee height by the end of the whole move.

Also, we found that if one was to grip, just a little too much in the entry and execution, one of us might end up with his face skin missing.  Apparently a few guys had rub burn on their ears!!  As any good dancer knows, this is because the leads were not doing something right, clearly!!  Had nothing to do with my vice like thighs clamping onto kyles neck and face for fear of cracking my head on the ground below!!

Anyway, as they say, practice makes perfect, and the social dance floor is not the time to practice aerials, so if you are up for a Sunday practice session in the park over summer, let me know!  Otherwise see you at the Christmas party tonight!!!

Jack and Jill went up the Hill

I love teaching - I really do - but its usually at the TasSwing Christmas party that I get a little bit annoyed and wish for just one night - I was "normal".  The sole reason for feeling this way, is the Jack and Jill competition.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with how the Jack and Jill works, it is as follows.  A certain number of leads line up, and  certain number of follows line up opposite them.  Then our dice monkey rolls the dice and follows move along (say if the dice landed on 3, follows would move along three leads).  Then the dancing begins.  This means you dont know who you will be dancing with, you dont know what song you will be dancing to, but you do know, all eyes will be watching the dance floor.

The aim of the game is to prove yourself to be the best lead, or the best follow, this is done through a number elimination rounds and maximum amounts of showing off of your wikid dance skillz.

Im not gonna lie to you, at first it seems really daunting, but believe me, it is well worth the experience and there are a few things that will help you get the jump on your competition.

Leads

Ok sure, you watched that youtube clip of that crazy aerial that must be easier than it looks - DO NOT TRY IT HERE.  Even the most experienced dancer should be warned against busting out arials on the Jack and Jill dance floor (any social dance floor for that matter).

Dont try to force your partner into a series of complicated spins, moves and tricks, sure by all means test out a few, but dont forget, a brilliant basic, with a beaming smile is worth more to your dance than a frown and a multitude of f*ups.

Dont be down on the girl who has only been dancing for four days and who has bravely agreed to go into the Jack and Jill.  The golden rule of dancing is to make your follow look good, and this means leading clear moves with determination, not giving up and leading like a fish then being grumpy at your gal.

Follows

JUST SMILE!  Ok its a bit more complicated than that, but keep in mind, your lead is out there trying to make you look good so damn it - SHINE!!  No matter what moves are thrown at you, or what leads you dont pick up on, no one will know if you smile through it (even giggle if you wanna!!)

Remember everything we taught you about dips.  A great dance can come undone by throwing your head at the floor.  Try to keep your chin above your belly button, your head forward of your bottom and your chin up (these rules apply even if you have been flipped over and you are hanging upside down!!)

Thank your lead for the dance, even though you are in a Jack and Jill competition, thanking your lead is a good sign of grace.  Even though its a competition, the most important part is that all contenders have a great time, so make sure you remember your manners (even if he treads on your feet!!).

Remember its all a bit of good old fashioned fun - ham it up and go for gold!!

a cup of light stalking anyone?

What is the difference between being a dead keen dancer, and the executor of mild stalking?  Great Question!  

I find that the difference is in both the delivery of the asking for a dance and in way a rejection is handled.  Below is a quiz you may find helpful.

Doing the asking (how to tell how much of a stalker you are)

1 - you have been social dancing all year, you have your favorite songs to dance to, and usually a particular partner to dance to that song with.  You hear your song come on and look frantically to see your destined dance partner already dancing with someone else.  Do you

a) walk up to the guy you wanted to dance with, scream at his partner to rack off because this is "your song, you always dance with this guy to THIS song" (you may or may not also stab her with your hidden dagger pen).

b) grab the nearest guy, girl, pole and try to outdance your competition, complete with dips, matching smiles and mind blowing jumps.

c) casually dance with whoever is around, but then very coldly reject they guy you wanted to dance with when he asks you for the next one, he had his chance and now he is dead to you

d) understand that whilst it would have been a blast to dance with that guy to that song, you'll grab the next one and have a blast with who ever you are dancing with!

2 - You ask a guy to dance and he politely declines, telling you he has to take a break and freshen up but will come find you soon.  Do you

a) accuse him loudly of being a snob and not wanting to dance with you, wildly claim that he NEVER wants to dance with you and somehow expect this behavior to change his mind and accept a dance with you

b) whip out the baby wipe you have stuffed down your bra and mop his brow, explaining that now he is fresh he can have this dance with you, and also the next one cos he will now be fresh enough to dance all night

c) suspect he is blowing you off so you follow him to the mens room and patiently wait for him outside until he comes out.  You note loudly that he is still wearing the same shirt he was wearing and that he does not look that refreshed but conclude he should dance with you anyway

d) let him know to come find you, and then grab the next guy who comes along and have a great dance with him.

You have asked a guy to dance a few times tonight and he has either been committed to another girl, been on his way to freshen up, or is plumb tuckered out.  You ask one last time and he declines.  Do you

a) throw a loud tantrum and accuse him of being rude, sashay off and tell all the girls about how rude he is and how he has rejected you all night.  You make all your girlfriends pinkey promise to hate him forever and spread rumors that he picks his nose.

b) get out your note pad and reel off to him all the excuses he has ever given you over the past two years, giving each excuse its own interpretation of his voice, each one getting more and more whiny.  When you get to the last excuse you vehemently claim that you didn't even want to dance with him anyway, you just felt sorry for him having a face like the one he has.

c) accuse him of ruining your night, you have rejected everyone elses offer for a dance because you thought he was going to ask you for one and you didn't want to be busy. Now he owes you TEN dances to make up for what he has done and you insist on claiming the first one then and there and continue to dance with him until his debt has been paid back.

d) accept that one of two things is happening, this guy is trying to let you down gently because he does not want to dance with you, or he is actually having a really busy night!  Either way, there are loads of other people to dance with and you continue with your great night.

If you answered a, b or c to any of the above questions you are human, you are in the throes of swing passion and let me tell you, we have all been there (head full of bad memories, heart full of regret), but the key is to try to aim for d - the sane, grown up approach to having a great social dancing experience.  Sometimes its really hard to not feel personally attacked or rejected, sometimes you feel like you deserve a dance from someone and if you don't get it, it can be down right upsetting, but remember while you are running rings around some guy, begging for a dance and getting mad when you don't get what you want, there is a guy out there, trying to catch you for a dance, its a vicious cycle!! 

There is nothing wrong with asking someone to dance, and sometimes you have to ask a few times before you get a yes, and sometimes you ask a few times and still don't get that dance, but remember, no dance is better than a restraining order, so enjoy your evening and circulate the room, you never know who is midly stalking you!

goings on

Oh MAN, this time of year is so much fun but oh so busy!  Ive not blogged forever and some of my excuses include
*  Buying frocks at the Vintage Fair
* Meeting two new wedding couples and teaching them their wedding dance
* Teaching some dear friends of mine their wedding dance
* Private lessons, private lessons, private lessons
* Attending cooking classes at the Wursthaus Kitchen Salamanca http://www.wursthauskitchen.com.au/
* Celbrating the Birthday
* A feeding frenzy at Montys
* Loving my new Ice Blue Kitchenaid

The dancing amongst it all has taken a little bit of a back burner but it has been so nice to fill up the evenings with fine food, fine wine and friends! 

We are all gearing up for the upcoming ball, and although classes will conclude mid December and resume again in Feb (dates to be confirmed), I cant see any sign of my calendar freeing up for a while!

The Vintage Fair was held at the Masonic hall the weekend everyone was away at CCB.  Armed with my measurments and a measuring tape, I pawed through many a beautiful vintage frock.  My number one tip is to wear a knee lenght slip, this way if there are no change rooms (or the one they have is constantly occupied) you can always just find a corner, and do a subtle try on without drawing too much attention to yourself.  I managed to walk away with an original 1950s frock, lemon yellow and perfect for Pimms coctails on the balcony over summer!

The wedding classes have really picked up, with the requests getting wilder and wilder every new summer.  Non swing songs are always a challenge, but have all worked out, and I'm finding it easier and easier to help get everyone ready for their big day! Red Hot Tip for those thinking of a wedding dance: Choose a short song!

I fell in love with the kitchen at the Wursthaus, it was a smaller and more intimate affair compared to the Agrarian Kitchen www.theagrariankitchen.com/ although I would recommend ANYONE go to either.  I'm not sure what classes they will be running over the summer months, but I'm hoping to be at all of them!  A whole new world of flavors and techniques have been introduced to my own kitchen recently as a result of the cooking classes I have been doing, and I must say, I have enjoyed being a wide eyed student for a little while!

Dinner, celebrations and the Kitchenaid are all for my birthday.  Montys www.montys.com.au is my most favorite restaurant.  They know us so well, and are always so accommodation.  Don't be scared to sit down to a kilo of mussels and a gin and tonic to start your evening (that's right before you even look at entree).  I have my favorite items on the menu but also like to try something that I know I could never attempt to recreate at home (I try making the mussels every few weeks at home but still like theirs more!!).  If you only go out to dinner once in one year, this is the place you want to go to - pretty sure I'll say yes if you feel like inviting me too!!

Celebrations deserve a post of their own, but the best night of night was had, with the perfect venue taking care of all of my party decorating problems!  The Ivory Lounge with its lush velvet chaise lounges and low lighting created the perfect atmosphere for a sophisticated evening of cocktail and cucumber sandwiches.  Stay tuned for a more detailed post soon!

This blog may soon turn into part dancing - part gossip from my life - part details of juicy love affair with my Kitchenaid.  The retro Ice Blue is perfect for my kitchen, matches my apron, looks great on the bench and has already made my life easier!  Poor friends and family will soon be bombarded with home made cakes and pasta dough, cookies and home made sausages (that's right!! you can do that!!).  Im already dreaming of some time off over Christmas to put on some smooth tunes, and get my "Sally Home Maker" on followed by previously mentioned Pimms cocktails and dinner parties.

While The Cats Away - The Mice Will Play

It turns out due to some fancy pants blues event in Adelaide, I will soon have a weekend free for secret lady luxuries, like baking cookies, eyelash curling and PRIVATE DANCE LESSONS.

The wedding season has begun so time slots are filling up nicely - but if you are keen for a private lesson on the weekend of 16/17th October, send an email to relled@gmail.com to book a time.

Classes will be at my place, and every student will also get to sample said baking (if its too warm, lets go with home made lemonade!!).

I look forward to seeing you soon!

Relle

The highs and the lows

Why do people come to their first swing dancing lesson?  Why do they come back for more?  Why do they suddenly stop coming and become ghosts of "the old days"?

For some its easy to see, they are being dragged along by their significant other, usually an enthusiastic girl, dragging along a less than willing but has no choice guy - and low and behold - some of these guys are actually good! Its not often that I see it the other way round, some poor shy reluctant girl, getting bullied onto the dance floor by her super keen boyfriend, but it does happen every now and then!

Sometimes its a case of a few gals getting together just to try something new, have a little bit of fun, get out and about for a wed night.  After the beginner warm up - everyone cancels their gym membership and discover that dancing yourself thin is the new black!

For others it seems (and this for me it appears to be something of a recent turn of events), there is a desire to approach this dance as a competitive sport. Learn fast, dance faster.  Ask all the questions, do all the workshops, have all the private lessons and BE THE BEST at swing dancing and like the karate kid, practice the discipline day in and day out.  Often in front of a mirror, otherwise anywhere with a floor, regardless of the music, crowd, or appropriateness of doing a swing out into a crowded dining room of sedate retirees, trying to enjoy their meals.  These dancers seem to either stick around for the long haul, getting better and better at their art, or, they burn out in usually around 18 months.

The burn out blame is usually deflected.  I don't think I have ever heard "well, im just not that into dancing any more".  Its usually a case of  "I have nothing else to learn, so I'm not going to come to classes any more" or "I don't have anyone to dance with, no one is good enough for me so I'm just not going to bother."  Both reasons are heart breaking to hear, and result in people fading out of the scene for ever.  

The reality is, if you don't come to class and if you don't social dance, you get forgotten about pretty quickly, especially if you burn all of your bridges along the way.  No teacher ever likes to hear they have been out grown (the words "those who can do, those who cant teach" haunt my dreams), and no dancer ever likes to find out they were not good enough, and the irony is, you would never ever hear any of the "best" dancers make either of those claims.

Ive said it before and I will say it again, everyone can always learn from any class, be it a level "too high" for you or a level "too low" for you.  You might not learn new moves in a beginners class, you might not learn a new way of doing your foot work, or even hear a new joke, but you should feel as though you can take something away.  

A great dancer and good friend once said to me, "the great dancers make me feel amazing, I dont even have to lead them, I just hold their hand and they seem to float on air.  The beginers students make me work hard for my money.  I have to actually lead every move, think about every single step that im doing, they are whats made me the dancer that I am today.  I love dancing with the great dancers, but when I need a reminder to be humble, I dance with one of your students, and it becomes very clear, that I still don't know everything". 

People like my friend, they always find a reason to dance, because they love it, they love knowing that they aren't the best in the world (but also love not sucking at it), they love the music, the lessons, the other dancers, they highs and the lows. 

I caught up with this guy after the recent Joel and Sophie workshops and he reminded me that I love the highs and lows too.  I'm pretty inspired at the moment.  Stay turned for my plans for the summer!!